Friends are God's Gift but also God's Test!
"Life is a test, Life is a trust, and life is a temporary assignment." (Rick Warren)
One of my friends from NH and I lost contact for a few years after my son was born. I was in a difficult space at the time and felt like every phone call was centered around her. At the time her life's worried seemed so trivial compared to my son fighting for his life in the NICU. I never said a word but rather just allowed time to give us some space. Out of the blue this weekend she contacted me. Her husband has been shipped to Iraq for a year or more with the National Guard. She apologized for not being the friend I needed her to be. I forgave her. I never told her why I took time away.. She knew in her heart. I am ready to be the friend she needs.
"Those who have hurt you in the past cannot continue to hurt you now unless you hold on to the pain through resentment. Your past is past! Nothing will change it. You are only hurting yourself with your bitterness. For your own sake, learn from it, and then let it go. " (Rick Warren)
"To worry yourself to death with resentment would be foolish, senseless thing to do." Job 5:2
Why is it sometimes in our lives we are going down the river tubing with our friends, each hanging on to one another, laughing and enjoying life in a perfect circle. Suddenly, without warning someone / something / changes. The water starts to rise, the current picks up speed, and then one person makes a bad choice. One friend chooses to not work as a unit, and help each other through the rough waters. Now your tight group is suddenly spread out across the river in a long line with each person trying to hang on. Whispering begins and now not everyone can hear what's being said, words are spoken that cannot be taken back. Those words... Hurt.. They cut... In reaction you let go of your friends raft. It's time... The river is splitting your heading into calm waters while she continues to try and fight the rapids. Your not angry.. Your sad... sad to see her floating away. Your sad to know the truth of what she thinks of you. You quickly turn away gather your remaining friends up and find that perfect circle again. It hurts when a friend doesn't support you in your journey. I will Pray for my friend as she rides the rapids.
"God keeps his promise, and he will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out." 1 Corinthians 10:13
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3 comments:
Hugs Martha, I'm glad your friend contacted you and you forgave her!
Sometimes that friend that seems to not want to support is having his/her own struggle that cannot be shared. It seems like they are abandoning you but maybe that's not true. Maybe they are overloaded.
It's hard to be the one that drifted away, too...
To the person who posted Anonymous.. Sorry I cannot respond by e-mail. Your right this very well could be true. BUT.. when this person is making comments to others about your core being, how long do you stay and remain friends? If this person doesn't honor you and value you, and says things that take away part of who you are. How can you call this person a friend?
I have been the one who has drifted away before.. either side of the coin is not an easy one.
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